Who is the "ENEMY?"

So, the statement goes "keep your friends close and your enemies closer". Sadly, in some cases we need to keep our "friends" closer. Think about it. When we know that someone is our "enemy" we know where our relationship with the person stands. However, we have a higher expectation of friends. We expect friends to be there for us, to support us, to speak positive into our lives, and to uplift us. We don't expect friends to tear us down or to bring any type of harm upon us. Today, it is hard to tell whether a person is truly a friend or enemy. Sometimes our enemies come dressed and disguised as our friends. We let our guards down, only to discover that they were never really a friend. For this reason, in some cases it is best to keep our friends closer because that person just may be the enemy disguised as a friend.

First, keeping your "frenemy" closer allows you to stay aware. When we develop bonds and relationships with people, we build trust. Trust is the key to good relationships, but it can also be detrimental to relationships with "frenemies". Trust isn't good in "frenemy" relationships because it interferes with your best judgment. You trust the person, so you ignore the signs of the person being a "frenemy". Trust pushes you to believe that the person has your best interest at heart. You don't want to believe that someone you have developed a relationship with is not your friend. It isn't until the person does something outright that you start to believe that they are not a friend.

Second, keeping your frenemy closer, will help you grow as a person. When we learn that someone who we thought was a friend is really a enemy, we want to immediately abandon them and never look back. While this may be a solution, it is not the best solution. It is not the best solution because we will come into contact with "frenemies" throughout our lives. It is best that we learn how to deal with them without having to try to avoid them completely. When we learn how to deal with such people, we know that we can treat them with respect and kindness without getting hurt. We must remember that we have to treat others with respect regardless of who they are. Learning how to treat your frenemies will show personal growth.

Last, don't dwell on the negative. In all relationships we learn something. I think that we can learn more in those relationships with our frenemies. We can learn more because we have to be more open and aware. We have to pay attention more. Instead of being angry and thinking it was time wasted, focus on the positive things you gained.

So, when building new relationships and bonds, stay aware of who the person is and what the person means to you. Don't ignore the signs. If the person turns out to be a "frenemy", you don't have to cut them completely off or be nasty towards them. Learn to keep them closer. Trust me, keeping them closer will protect you in the long run.