0 to 100 really quick!!!

I am a very emotional person. I can go from crying to laughing to anger and back to anger within five minutes. I have realized that I allow situations to take me from zero, a happy calm, to 100, bloody anger really fast. I don't give myself time to process my true feeling or thoughts, I simply explode. Sometimes my explosions cause issues that my heart doesn't really want. I forget everything and everybody and explode. For some reason in the moment I think that my only option is to get what I want to say off of my chest. Afterwards, I can quickly go back to zero. Sadly, I expect everyone else to go back to zero as well. Then it upsets me more when those people don't go back to zero, and hold on to the things that I exploded about.

Exploding and saying nasty and hurtful things isn't helping me on my journey back to myself. It is actually a very nasty trait that stands in the way of my relationship with God. Just imagine if God went from 0 to 100 when I did something. If he did, I would have some very hurt feeling. I am sure that I make him angry often, but he remains the same God. God wants us to follow him and act as he would. God doesn't go around blowing up on people like some erratic person, when he has every right to. Instead, God is so patient, forgiving and kind to us, yet I choose to tell people how I feel despite their feelings.

Blowing up without thinking does two things. First, it hurts the person you blew up on. Most times the people we blow up on, are people that we love. Let's be honest, we don't go around blowing up on strangers (I hope not). Why would we ever want to hurt those we love. Yes, they do things that we don't like, and they may even hurt us, but hurt does not fix hurt. What good does it do me hurting someone who hurt me? Now I only have two hurt people. Why not be the bigger person?

Second, it makes you look and feel worse than you did before you exploded.  I know there have been times that I reacted to something, and afterwards I felt stupid, and I'm sure that I looked crazy. Ten seconds of blowing up can ruin your entire reputation. Why blow up so fast, and later owe everyone apologies or be afraid and embarrassed? I know there have been times that I went from 0 to 100 and afterwards I felt that the situation wasn't that serious. I have allowed my erratic behavior to ruin relationships that I long for now. Why hurt your own feelings?

When someone says or does something that you disagree with, give yourself time to think it over. Don't immediately respond because you may respond out of anger. Use the cooling off period as a time to reflect and decide if the action even deserves a response. Trust me, sometimes the best response is no response at all. Remember, don't ruin relationships or cause hurt by going from 0 to 100 without thinking.

Psalms 39:1-2 I said to myself, “I will watch what I do and not sin in what I say. I will hold my tongue when the ungodly are around me.”