Some people are just "SEASONAL"

Have you ever supported someone through the storm only to have them disappear when the storm subsided? Have you worked hard to solve someone's problems only to have them turn their backs when the problem is resolved? I'm sure most of us have dealt with situations similar. It is normal to get upset and feel used, but we have to realize that these people are "SEASONAL". I recall on many occasions getting angry thinking about the time and effort I put into helping someone only to have them disappear when life seemed better or when I needed them. However, I have learned to accept that some people only come into your life for a season. Yes, I had heard the saying before, but I didn't really grasp it because I would get angry when those seasonal people left me high and dry. I would question whether they were ever loyal or if they were in it for their benefit. Honestly, I would get angry because I felt used. It wasn't until recently that I realized that I shouldn't feel used because each "SEASONAL" person was a learning lesson.

First, my encounters with seasonal people taught me to give without expecting to receive the same treatment in return. Yes, most of us have grown up hearing "do unto others as you will have them do unto you". I agree that we should treat others how we want them to treat us, but this doesn't always happen. Everyone doesn't live by the GOLDEN RULE. Instead of worrying about the person returning the favor, just do as your heart tells you. Now, don't get me wrong. I am not saying be crazy either. I'm just saying, If that person is your "FRIEND" or "FAMILY" and in your heart you want to help, help them without expecting something in return. When you help them, it doesn't matter if they ever return the favor. If we learn to go into situations with the mindset, "I'm helping because it's the right thing to do, or because I want to", we want be disappointed when the seasonal people disappear or fail to return the favor.

Second, the seasonal people made room for the lifetime people. Wouldn't you rather have someone around who is there for the long haul? Well, most times the "LIFETIME" person can't come around because the "SEASONAL" person is keeping the spot warm. This is why we have to learn to let go. Don't get angry.  Instead, cut ties and prepare for those people who are going to stick around. When that seasonal person chooses to leave, don't waste any more energy or time talking about it, thinking about it, or trying to fix the situation. Let them go. Trust me, you will appreciate it in the long run.

Third, the seasonal people taught me something about myself. Why did I do what I did? Why did I allow the person in? Instead of focusing on them and the type of person they are, focus on you and why you attracted that type of person. Focus on making yourself better. That person should not be your concern. Trust me they aren't concerned about you or your feelings. If so, they wouldn't have been seasonal and would still be around. So, don't give them that much power. Take the situation and make it a learning situation. Grow from it.

Fourth, I had to learn to forgive and let go. We are human, so we get mad when we feel used or abandoned. We want to retaliate or tell the person how we feel. I understand wanting to let the person have it, but it's not worth it. The best thing you can do is move on like it never happened. Trust me that person will see you living and moving forward. They will probably even need you again. They will feel worse when they see you aren't holding grudges and have moved on with your life. Don't give them anything to discuss or use against you. Move on.

In life we run across many people who are seasonal. We often confuse them with lifetime people because at the start the friendships and relationships are good. I know that I am guilty of giving people the benefit, and ignoring signs that they aren't in it for the long haul. Although at first I was angry, I realized that those encounter have taught me lessons that I can appreciate. So, don't get angry at those "SEASONAL" people. Forgive them, move forward, and take it as learning experience.